Guinness Is Good For You

Remember when The Guinness Book of World Records was like, the coolest thing ever? Was that only me? Nah, other people had to feel that way when they were 10.

Fiddle came home from school clutching his shiny red Guinness Book courtesy of the Scholastic book orders. Oh, those things were so great. I remember frantically circling book after book and then bargaining with my parents to get that Ultimate Annie Sticker Collectors book and the newest Babysitter's Club book hot off the presses.

Fiddle spent the next two hours yelling out random facts as though he suffered from some sort of trivia Tourette's syndrome.

For your useless trivia needs:

• Largest Prosthetic Leg belongs to an Asian elephant named Motala in Thailand. It lost its left front foot in a land mine accident in 1999. (SAD!) After an operation involving more than 30 vets, she received a silicon/fiberglass limb big and strong enough to hold her weight.
  

Damn, you should see this picture!

• Those crazy Germans, Tom Sietas holds the record for holding your breath, 14 minutes and twelve seconds under 10 feet of water. But that is nothing compared to the accomplishments of Thomas Vogel who, with only one hand, unhooked 56 bras in one minute.

Ahem, leaving every imaginable bad joke and moving on.

• Largest chocolate igloo. (Really?!) Made by Marco Fanti in Perugia, Italy.

I am so moving ot Perugia, Italy. Who thinks this stuff up??

• Largest cucumber grown by Alfred J. Cob of the UK, it measured 35.1 inches.

Oh the bad jokes, they pain me to leave unsaid!

• Highest rate of alcohol consumption per capita- Luxembourg.

Maybe I can get Marco to build me a chocolate igloo in Luxembourg? That would be doubly sweet!